kindness counts

Kindness is defined as the quality of being friendly, generous, and considerate. I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately, and in a variety of contexts. Division abounds: in our country, in our workplaces, in churches, within families. What kind of impact could we have if we carried a mantle of kindness? If we let kindness frame our words and actions? What would that look like? Let’s explore the myriad ways that kindness counts.

The science of kindness

I’m sure you’ve heard the phrase, “random acts of kindness.” It’s a movement that encourages people to spread positive energy through helpful and encouraging actions. The random acts of kindness website has a wealth of wonderful information, including some fascinating thoughts on the science of kindness.

What kindness builds

Research shows that kindness does far more than lift our spirits; it strengthens both body and mind. Acts of kindness trigger oxytocin, sometimes called the “love hormone,” which helps lower blood pressure, protect the heart, and boost confidence and optimism. Helping others also increases energy and can even extend lifespan, with studies showing that those who volunteer regularly experience fewer aches, less stress, and longer lives. On a neurological level, giving activates the brain’s reward center, creating what scientists call a “helper’s high.” Kindness also stimulates serotonin and endorphins, chemicals that calm the mind, ease pain, and enhance overall well-being.

Other benefits of kindness

Kindness doesn’t just make us feel good. It reduces pain, anxiety, depression, and stress. People who practice kindness tend to have lower levels of cortisol, the stress hormone, and report greater life satisfaction and self-worth. The benefits are so strong that researchers describe kindness as both “cardioprotective” and mood-boosting. Even better, kindness can be taught and multiplied. Compassion grows stronger with practice, and when we witness kind acts, our own brains respond with a lift in mood and a greater desire to “pay it forward.” One simple gesture can spark a ripple effect, improving not just one person’s day but the well-being of an entire community.

Kindness counts in relationships.

All of our relationships would benefit from an extra dose of kindness. Family. Friends. Neighbors. Colleagues. Small things can make a big difference, and kind gestures don’t necessarily cost money. What about experimenting with random acts of kindness for complete strangers? Why not?

Let’s consider a few simple ideas for showing kindness:

• Make an extra effort to say “please” and “thank you” at home.
• Go out of your way to prepare your loved one’s favorite snack or drink.
• Ask them if there’s anything they need help with that day.
• Send an encouraging “thinking of you” text to a family member or friend.
• Regularly tell your loved ones what you appreciate about them. Be specific.
• In fact, make a point of offering a thoughtful compliment to everyone you talk to. “Your smile made my day,” “I’ve enjoyed seeing you today,” or “you’re so helpful” can make a difference.
• Smile at people you pass. Hold doors. Offer a friendly greeting.
• Carefully listen to people. Look them in the eye. Ask follow-up questions.
• Check in on someone you know is struggling.
• Share a favorite book, recipe, or song with someone.
• Invite someone over for coffee, tea, or a walk.
• Go through your closets and find things you’re ready to donate. Take them to a local agency. This could brighten someone’s day.
• Put together a few bags with packaged snacks and bottled water. Pass them out at a park. Alternatively, put together a few hygiene kits with whatever you can manage: toothbrush, toothpaste, soap, washcloth, shampoo, deodorant, etc.
• Gather together books and magazines you no longer need and take them to your local library. Many college campuses have magazine racks for people to swap and share.
• Leave a positive note for someone to find.

After you’ve made a concerted effort for several weeks, take a moment to reflect on your experiences. What have you noticed? Any changes in your relationships? Do you want to do more? What other things might you try?

What about kindness toward yourself?

Yes, this! We all could do better. Let’s make a point of making space for an activity that renews and revitalizes us, whatever that might be. Reading. Journaling. Enjoying nature. Listening to music. Creating. I suspect that intentional kindness toward others will feed into this as well, but I think it’s a good idea to set aside time regularly where we can rest and reset. And watch our self-talk! Only positive vibes allowed. 🙂

Kindness counts in politics.

I’ve avoided talking about politics on this platform. What I’d like to share here is a way of viewing politics through a lens of kindness and integrity. When I decide for whom to cast my vote, I like to think about each candidate’s character. Are they honest? Articulate? Intelligent? Humble? Even-tempered? Are they respectable, respectful, and responsible? Are they eager learners? Do they care about people, including those on the margins? Are they focused on bringing people together and finding common ground? Are they kind? These things matter to me.

There’s another side to this kindness coin when it comes to politics: kindness in our conversations about politics. I know I often don’t react well when an unpleasant political discussion arises. It’s hard for me to keep quiet when politicians are cavalier with others’ feelings. When they only care about themselves. But I can do better. In any case, I will continue viewing candidates through this lens.

Kindness counts in scripture.

Kindness shows up throughout scripture as both a calling and a way of life. It reflects God’s character and shapes how we live in community with others. These passages remind us that kindness isn’t only about being polite or gentle. Rather, it’s a spiritual practice rooted in justice, compassion, and love.

As a calling

Micah 6:8 – “What does the Lord require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God?” This verse anchors kindness in humility and justice. It reminds us that kindness isn’t separate from doing what’s right. It’s part of living faithfully before God.

Toward others in need

Proverbs 19:17 – “Whoever is kind to the poor lends to the Lord, and will be repaid in full.” Kindness shown to those in need is seen by God as a sacred offering. This verse reframes generosity not as charity but as partnership with God’s compassion.

Kindness and justice together

Zechariah 7:9–10 – “Administer true justice; show kindness and mercy to one another. Do not oppress the widow, the orphan, the alien, or the poor.” Here, kindness and mercy are tied to fairness and inclusion. God’s call to kindness is inseparable from the call to protect the vulnerable and seek equity for all.

In daily relationships

Ephesians 4:32 – “Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ has forgiven you.” Paul points to kindness as the natural outgrowth of forgiveness. It’s not reactive but intentional, a choice to treat others with the same grace God extends to us.

As a way of life

Colossians 3:12 – “Clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience.” One of my favorite verses!! This passage describes kindness as something we “put on.” It’s as visible and deliberate as clothing, shaping how we present ourselves in every encounter.

As a fruit of the Spirit

Galatians 5:22–23 – “The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.” Kindness grows from the Spirit’s work within us. It’s not forced or superficial but a sign that God’s love is taking root in our hearts.

When we choose kindness, we participate in God’s ongoing work of renewal. Small acts of care and mercy can open hearts, mend relationships, and remind others of their worth. Each gesture of kindness, no matter how ordinary, counts.

Have you heard these quotes?

Kindness has inspired countless voices throughout history. These words remind us that small acts of care and compassion carry lasting impact.

Henry James – “Three things in human life are important. The first is to be kind, the second is to be kind, and the third is to be kind.” (Often quoted by Fred Rogers.)

Mother Teresa – “Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless.”

Aesop – “No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted.” (From the story of the lion and the mouse. Love that one!)

John Wesley – “Do all the good you can, by all the means you can, in all the ways you can, in all the places you can, at all the times you can, to all the people you can, as long as ever you can.” (I hear this one often at church!)

Let these words encourage us to make kindness an everyday practice, knowing that each thoughtful gesture matters.

Small acts, big impact—kindness counts.

Where will you start? Any ideas for small acts of kindness you might carry out this week, either for a loved one or a stranger? Please share your thoughts in the comments!

Check out this website with kindness clothing–so many fun options!

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• The Secret Life of Sunflowers by Marta Molnar: five stars!
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• 18 notable parks in the Midwest
• imaginative contemplation
• the Lord’s Prayer throughout scripture
• The Diamond Eye by Kate Quinn: a five-star masterpiece!
• cultivate presence: start on the porch
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• The Gifts of Imperfection by Brené Brown: five stars!
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Fondly,

Crysti